By Lorraine Morgan Scott
When you think of letting go, what comes to mind? Probably, we have different visions and versions of “letting go” and that’s ok, because what I’m talking about applies to your version and mine. Simple right?
Maybe you are holding on to a wrong that was done to you when you were a child. Maybe you have anger for an insult last week. Maybe you won’t allow your teenage daughter to go to a dance or go on a date. Maybe you worry about whether you’ll be promoted at work or accepted for a school scholarship. Maybe you worry if you’re thin enough or pretty enough or good enough to attract that man you’re interested in. Maybe you worry if your business will fail or your wife will leave you. Maybe you just want to be free of the pain your old bones are causing you.
Each of these worries and concerns are normal everyday thoughts. Each of these hopes and fears are valid to you and based on some prior experience. What I’m suggesting is “letting go” of the fears and the worries. How would your life be different if you didn’t worry so much about life and love and just started living life and being in love? How would your relationships be if you didn’t hold a child back from growth and development or a spouse back from their ambitions? What if you let go of the anger and resentment? If the idea I’m presenting sounds scary or you feel a weird bubbling feeling inside – maybe you’re holding on to things too tightly.
- Have you ever realized that when you’re angry – you suffer more than the one you’re angry with?
- Has that resentment you’re holding on to from twenty-seven years ago done anything of value for you? Or is it just a weight on your shoulder that pounds your head every time you think about that person or what they did to you.
- When you tell your child (for their own good) that he or she can’t do something, (you feel justified because you’re protecting them) do you notice the flicker of pain and then something else (like resentment, determination, or anger) in their eyes?
- Do you wake up at night stressed about school, work, or whether you’ll be successful tomorrow?
If you answer yes to any of these questions (or something similar), then maybe it’s time to let go. Your worry and stress does nothing for you, but maybe give you an ulcer. Learn to let go. Carrying anger and resentment is horrible for your mind and body. Do yourself a favor and forgive the person. You’ll feel tons lighter and better, and you can put that energy to something that actually benefits you. Instead of worrying about a presentation or promotion, acknowledge you’ve done your best to prepare, and then be your best self until your rewards are received. As you allow your child to grow into an adult, recognize that they’ll probably make mistakes, but it’s during the errors and challenges that we/they grow the most. You can’t keep your teen a tween or child forever; they’ll grow and mature. You want that, you do. Set them up for success by teaching them what they should know. Then, when they are faced with decisions, they’ll have the tools and confidence to make wise decisions.
Let go and meditate. Let go and do yoga. Let go and trust yourself. Let go and be part of the world around you. You can do it.
Let go of the worry, fear, anger, jealousy, insecurity, stress, or whatever you’re holding on to – and start enjoying the wonderful life you have. I’m here to talk with you if you need help learning to let go.
Photo Credit: Sachi Lane, 2017