“I’m working so hard but I can’t seem to lose the weight!” cried one woman. “I don’t know what’s wrong, why can’t I get ahead?” moaned another. Frustration was evident in their voices as goals were discussed, but when we drilled down deep into what their whole week’s actions looked like the dots started to connect into something they could see and understand.
Are you doing just enough to get yourself frustrated?
Many times we make a goal and put actions in place to support achieving that goal. That part is great, but where some of us (me included) set our self up for frustration is when we don’t consider the whole goal: what is it, what does it look and feel like, what do we need to do to achieve it and how will we know when we’ve achieved it.
Each part of setting goals is important, yet the one that will keep us frustrated with our progress is the one part that defines what we need to do – what actions do we need to do on a 360 degree level to achieve our goal.
Say you want to become a millionaire in one year. What do you need to do to achieve it? Well, you need to earn $2,739.73 every day for 365 days. What actions will you take to earn that daily rate? How can you plan for short days?
Or, say you want to lose ten pounds. What dietary and lifestyle changes do you need to make? Are you exercising daily but the intensity level isn’t enough to affect change? Are you eating healthy throughout the day but then having ice cream while watching late night TV? A whole-person lifestyle plan will help keep you from getting frustrated with progress and address occasional highs, lows, and plateaus.
Whatever your goal, whether it’s losing weight, becoming a millionaire, or simply improving your typing speed or golf score – consider the whole goal approach: what’s the goal, what does success look like (visualize it), what would it feel like to achieve it (imagine the feeling of success), and what actions need to be taken on a daily basis to achieve the goal (backward planning is a great tool here).
Once you determine what exactly your goal is, and you’ve determined what actions will satisfy achieving that goal, then you have accurate information to decide if you still want to go after the goal, or reconsider it. Maybe earning $2,739.73 every day for 365 days is more than you want to attempt (you currently earn $50,000 a year). So maybe instead of becoming a millionaire in one year you go after a less-aggressive goal of becoming a millionaire in five years. The “whole goal” approach will help keep frustration out of your day so you can concentrate on being your wonderful self.
Lorraine Morgan Scott is author of “Loving Myself First: Overcoming Life’s Obstacles (Past, Present and Future)”, a certified coach, as well as a motivational speaker and singer. She specializes in helping women define their goals and reach their dreams. Contact her via email: Lorraine@PepTalkCap.com to comment or suggest a topic.